Cutting the Cable TV Cord

When I moved into my new house after separating from my husband, I didn’t sign up for cable or satellite TV because I decided that I had spent way too many hours in front of the TV literally watching nothing.  We had satellite TV and I wasn’t willing to fork out over one hundred dollars a month or more for something I could literally do without.  Do you know how many pair of shoes you can buy for $100?  At least one really good pair, anyway.

Besides, I usually always end up watching the same shows.  You know the ones:  any version of Star Trek, M*A*S*H (I can never get enough M*A*S*H), Triple-D (admit it, you know what that means), American Pickers, and, this pains me to admit it, Ice Road Truckers.  I would sit for hours upon hours feeling the IQ points seeping out my ears and thinking I could probably be doing something more constructive but can’t wait to see if they make it across that frozen lake without falling in, truck and all. Plus most of the shows I watch are available on the internet or through some service such as Netflix or Amazon Prime and a slew more on Hulu.  So with a high speed internet connection, a Roku box and an iPad or computer I get all the TV I need, which has been averaging about 20 minutes a day.

There are a few shows that are, remarkably, not available through any of the aforementioned venues, and those I can record on the DVR at work and watch during my lunch hour.  The other ones, like M*A*S*H, I just purchased the DVD’s and pop them in my player to get my fix.  

I’m not completely cut off from the world, though.   After a browse through Amazon’s website, I found an inexpensive over-the-air TV antenna and hooked it up to my TV in my living room and bedroom and that serves as my backup in case there is severe weather in the area or my go-to when the football games are on (Go Pack!).  I get 30+ channels over the air … all for free!  Not to mention the picture quality is sharper than over cable or satellite.  

Admittedly, when I’m cooking in the kitchen I do like to have a TV on just to have some noise in the house.  Usually it’s Captain Janeway and crew of the Starship Voyager keeping me company.  Otherwise, I tune the TV to the local PBS station and get to watch an afternoon full of cooking shows.

So what do I do instead of watching TV?  Take my dog for a longer walks, workout, play the piano, sew, garden, read, study the bible, clean the house, or do any little projects that you never seem to have time to get done.

I have discovered that there is life after cutting the cord to cable TV.  There’s so much more to do than to keep our butts parked on the couch.  Give it a try.  Your mind and body will thank you.

Pantry Cooking

I am a pantry cook.  I have been for years.  I divorced my first husband when my son was two and throughout the years of being a single mom and trying to make healthy meals for my son on a budget, I became a pantry cook.  The key to being a good pantry cook is, of course, having a well-stocked pantry.  My pantry isn’t excessive -- just things that I need to cook the majority of the meals that I like.  

In addition to my dry and canned goods pantry, I have a stand up freezer that I also use as my pantry.  It’s full of everything from frozen vegetables to tv dinners.  I have extra nuts in there (used for baking), frozen meats (that I bought on sale), tomatoes from my garden, shrimp bought in bulk and then divided into individual portions, leftover turkey carcasses (for soup), etc.  

I almost never buy meat that is not on sale.  I watch the grocery store ads twice a week and usually buy whatever is on sale.  One of my favorites is whole chickens for $0.99 cents per pound.  I usually grab one that is about 3½ to four pounds, so I’m only paying $4.00 max for it.  Do you know how many meals I can get out of a whole chicken?  Tons! First, roasted chicken. Second, chicken sandwiches. Third, chicken salad. Finally, chicken noodle soup with whatever is left over.

Some of my other favorites are boneless, skinless chicken breasts which I pound out to about ½” thick and individually vacuum seal before I freeze them, pork chops which get frozen individually, ground beef which I usually freeze in one pound packages, and steaks which I will, again, vacuum seal and put in the freezer.  All of these items can be taken out, thawed quickly, and are just as good as they were when they were fresh.  Butter is another item that I buy on sale and freeze.  Never, never, NEVER pay full price for a pound of butter.  I’ve always got some in the freezer.

Now that I live alone and usually only prepare meals for one, these items come in doubly handy.  The chicken breasts, when placed in a small amount of cold water in the sink, thaw out in about 15 minutes.  By cooking up just a few fresh veggies that are “staples” in my fridge I can whip up a batch of Fajita Chicken in no time.  Feel like spaghetti tonight?  I usually have frozen spaghetti sauce in the freezer in containers that hold two servings.  Why two?  Because leftover spaghetti is great for lunch the next day.  You can usually find a bowl or two of soup, a wonderful rice pilaf recipe that I have, chili, or even some desserts that have made their way in there.

In my dry and canned goods pantry I keep lots of canned tomatoes, beans for chili, flour, sugar, the protein bars I like for breakfast, cereals for Chex mix, lots of dried pasta, soup stocks, baking items such as chocolate chips, cake and brownie mixes, and snack items that I find on sale.  I always have a good supply of spices on hand too.  

My goal in having this pantry is that I when I go shopping I usually only have to pick up fresh produce, eggs, lunch meat and bread at the grocery store.  Then I will only pick up what is on sale to fill my pantry.  Pasta 10 for $10 -- I’m on that!!  Frozen veggies on sale -- I grab ‘em.   Steaks on sale for five bucks a pound -- let’s get grilling!  I have found that by having this pantry I can make just about any meal I find in a cookbook as long as it doesn’t call for something too exotic.  

Give it a try and start your pantry today.  It will grow slowly in the beginning, but as the weeks go by you will be amazed at how well stocked your cupboards can be.  

Listening for God's Voice

“God, please just tell me what to do!” How many times have you said that, screamed that, pleaded with God while down on your knees? “Say something, anything. Give me a sign!” I know that I have said it countless times. Why does this have to be so hard?  

I was having one of these conversations with God the other day on my way to work. I do this quite frequently. I’ll be driving to work, my audio book playing on the radio, and me not hearing a word of it because my mind is whirling with unspoken frustrations. Prayers are good, but to me they are supposed to be these calm, peaceful, measured words that tend to fit into what I think should be said in faith and humility. What I experienced on that particular day was anything but calm and my words were not measured or planned. I wanted to have a real conversation with God.  

Saying your prayers in your mind is different than actually talking out loud directly to God. I call these meat-and-potatoes prayers. They are what you are really feeling at that moment, they have substance. The words don’t sound like they came out of the King James version of the bible, they come from my heart, in my own words, disjointed, jaded, frustrated; or on a good day they are praiseful, joyous and humbled. They come from a child of God speaking to her heavenly Father who promised us in Mark 11:24, “Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours (ESV),” and in Matthew 7:7, “Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you (ESV).”

What I have learned over the years is that God IS speaking to us, we just have to listen. 

Our answers don’t always come in the form we expect. It’s not always a voice in your mind that you KNOW is God’s.  I’ve had that wonderful experience a couple of times. One time I had been out of work for six weeks and as a single Mom I was worried I wasn’t going to find work. I had been praying, “Please, God, please just find me a job!” On this particular day I just found out I had landed a new job. As I was out walking my dog I was saying over and over, out loud, “Thank you, God! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!” This very distinctive voice came into my mind saying, “Don’t you know I will always take care of you?” It literally stopped me in my tracks.

But on that day while driving to work I didn’t get the booming voice. I said my piece, voiced my frustrations, and thanked God for letting me vent and for listening. Silence. You could hear the crickets. I turned the radio back on and continued my drive to work.  

What I asked God for on that day was for something to do. Not busy-work, but a real, substantive, God-driven project. I wanted a purpose. I got through my separation and divorce literally by the Grace of God, purchased a home and got everything unpacked and put away, adopted a dog, and was pretty much settled in my new life. I was keeping myself busy, scheduling something to do every night of the week, so I didn’t really have time to think about living alone. But I was restless.  

This conversation with God happened on a Friday.  

That Sunday, I was sitting in church and half-listening to the sermon. You know how it is sometimes--you try to concentrate on what the Pastor is saying but the weekends unfinished tasks keep coming into your mind:  “As soon as I get home I need to do (insert unfinished task here).” But something he said caught my ear:  “Your mind gets ahead of your soul.” Oh my gosh, that’s me! My mind was definitely ahead of my soul.

  

On that evening a friend of mine was over at my house and we got to talking about lots of things. I told her about the conversation I had with God and my restlessness. We talked about the Pastor’s message, and how we both took notice when we heard those seven words.  We talked about what we thought our purpose in life was, or what it should be.  We talked about lots of things.  I felt better, but I still didn’t have my answer.  “Patience,” I told myself, “God will answer.”

The answer did come, and had I not been looking for it I probably would have missed it.  It started with the pastor’s message.  Then, it was a scripture in an e-mail:

“I promise you this very day that I will repay two blessings for each of your troubles.” (Zechariah 9:12b, NLT).

After the first scripture passage I received, it was then a devotional in an e-mail about letting your aggravations accumulate.  Then another devotional using this scripture:

“Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.  Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.” (James 1:2-4 NIV)

Then I received an message from my friend saying she had been meaning to e-mail me but she had been terribly busy. What I didn’t know is that she had gone home after our conversation and prayed for me. The Holy Spirit placed a message on her heart for me.  The message:  God wants me to be healed first in order for me to be my best for Him.  It wasn’t the answer that I wanted, but it was the answer that I needed.

So many times we fail to recognize what God is trying to tell us. There are signs everywhere, we just have to be looking for them. My response to the message I received from God? Pure relief. I was getting a break. I was being put on the bench until I was ready to be back in the game. My Father knew what I needed better than I did. He wanted me to heal first. It was an act of pure love.

This isn’t the first time a message from God has been sent to me in this way. It normally comes from many places and in many different forms and I just need to be listening. God is speaking to us, and although it may not be in the form of a burning bush, it is just as obvious when you find it.  

May you find all your answers. God’s peace, my friends.

Valentine's Day Grinch

To me, as a single person, Valentine's Day is the ultimate in-your-face reminder that I don't have anyone special in my life. It reminds me with every TV commercial, billboard, magazine ad, and walk through a department store, that I no longer have a need for romance. Most days that doesn't bother me; but this time of year I turn into the Valentine's Day grinch.

So what does one do to get through this day of romance? I decided to take the romance out of Valentine's Day and think about the people I appreciate in my life.

Remember when you were in grade school and you would make out those hokey Valentines for everyone in your class?  I asked myself, if I had those Valentines today, to whom would I send one?

I did a search on the internet for "valentine messages" and flowershopnetwork.com has some cute ones. When I put them in context and address them to a specific person, they take on a whole new meaning.

To Jesus:  Whatever is worth doing, is worth doing with You!

To my son:  Right from the start, you stole my heart!

To my Bestie:  So many of my smiles begin with you!

For my family:  Even in a fairy tale where every dream comes true, I could never hope to find a family as wonderful as you!

To my pets:  I love you THIS much!

To my co-workers:  Wishing someone close to my heart a warm and wonderful day!

So I suppose I don't have to be the Valentine Grinch for long. My relationships may come up short in the romance department, but they certainly don't fall short in the love department. I am truly blessed to be surrounded by such loving friends and family.

Happy Valentine's Day everyone!

Plumbing Gremlins

I was very lucky when I was house hunting that I found a well kept, well maintained home that was in my price range.  Most of the major items had been done:  new furnace, roof, gutters, siding, water heater and driveway.  The only major item that needs to be done is the windows, but for now they work just fine.

When you own a home or a condo you can expect some maintenance issues to arise.  No one can tell you when the garbage disposal is going to get jammed or a light fixture will stop working.  My new house?  It has plumbing gremlins.  These gremlins run around the house and cause havoc with the plumbing systems and water in the house.  

Now I’m familiar with gremlins causing trouble.  There’s been many a Sunday that you can tell they are running around the sanctuary at church causing troubles. Mics that don’t work, missed entrances and forgotten cues on songs that were sung perfectly all throughout rehearsal, or hymnals that go missing and then show up again out of the blue.  These little guys are brilliant at causing mischief. And they have been very busy at my house.

My first issue:  I walked into the room where the furnace is only to find the floor covered with water. Upon further inspection, I found out that the little pump that is put on these high efficiency furnaces to pump the water that drains from the furnace had stopped working.  So my first trip to the hardware store was to purchase some tubing and I ran it from the furnace to the drain in the basement floor. Works like a champ, and I didn't have to ask for help.  

Second issue:  the garage floor doesn’t drain properly.  Although this isn’t technically a plumbing issue, it is a water issue and it’s driving me crazy.  There is always water sitting next to my car in the garage.  When it rains, it comes in under the door and pools just about right where I stand to get in my car.  When it’s cold outside, the snow will melt off the car and there will be a big puddle of water. Who in the heck do you call to fix this problem?  I have no idea.

Third issue:  after I got the furnace issue fixed, imagine my surprise to find more water on the basement floor a few weeks later.  At first I thought it was my upright freezer leaking. I dried up the water and a couple days later more showed up. After further investigation I found out that the water was coming from behind the wall in the unfinished part of the basement. I thought for sure my water softener was leaking. I mopped up the water and waited to see if it happened again. It did, six days later, and then six days after that. So I called the water softener people (it’s a rental) and they came out to look at it. The repairman said the softener was working fine and that it was probably a drain issue.

A few weeks later, on a Sunday of course, it happened again, only this time the water was coming out of the drain that was put on the side of my main plumbing stack. Oh great!! Desperate I called my brother and asked him what I should do. He was great and came right out, but decided that I needed a plumber because there was most likely a clog somewhere. Fortunately I have an ex-brother-in-law that is a plumber and he came out and was able to snake the drain and find the clog right away. Thank goodness it wasn’t something more serious, just a 50-year old plumbing stack that had finally collected enough goop to stop it from flowing. And fortunately, my brother came out another day and fixed the other drain issue.

Fourth issue: In the midst of hosting a family reunion at my house I went to flip the switch for the garbage disposal and it chose that moment to stop working. The motor ran, but the blades weren’t turning. Obviously there was something stuck in it, but upon closer inspection I could not tell what the culprit was. Fortunately, my brother-in-law was visiting and he’s one of those great handymen that can fix just about anything and he was eventually able to get the innards to move and un-stick the grinding mechanism. Good thing he was there because I had just about had it with all these darn plumbing issues.

Needless to say the plumbing gremlins have been very busy.  Hopefully they will eventually calm down and leave my house alone.  Maybe I can send them over to the neighbors?

Two Pennies

I have the privilege of serving on the Finance Committee at my church.  One of the duties that falls to the Committee members is to collect the offering after church service, place it in a secured bank pouch, and drop it off at the bank.  The offering plate is usually full of the green envelopes into which church members put their tithes, paper money, and sometimes loose change.  One Sunday, layered under the green envelopes and a few loose bills, were two pennies. I picked up the two pennies and held them tightly in my hand and brought my clenched hand close to my heart.  This offering above all else, took my breath away.  In my eyes, these two pennies represented somebody giving all they had when the offering plate came around.

We are a downtown church in a suburb of a major city in Wisconsin.  Being a downtown church we have the privilege of serving a community that most churches don’t get to serve -- the homeless, the poor, the downtrodden.  Our doors are open all week long so anyone can come in and sit in the sanctuary and pray, or talk to a minister for counsel and prayer.  We are not a rich mega-church; but we do have a supply of peanut butter, jelly, and loaves of bread to hand out to people who don’t know where their next meal is coming from.  As such, every once in a while we get a person joining us for worship service that, well, doesn’t quite fit in.  

I am part of the song leadership team for our church.  We sit up in the chancel area behind the altar and face the congregation.  We get to watch the congregation watching us.  So we tend to see things other attending members, and sometimes even the pastors, don’t.  We see the person with the crumpled coat and bags of stuff sit down in one of the back pews.  We see them look around and try to figure out what they’re supposed to do.  We see the joy in their faces as they listen to the pastor’s sermon and can tell when they have their “lightbulb” moment.  

On this particular day I had noticed such a person sitting in the third pew from the back in the right hand section.  I would like to think those two pennies came from him because I watched his face as our Pastor gave his sermon and I could see that the message given that day seemed to be exactly what he needed to hear.  I watched him change from someone who was hesitant to sing the first few hymns to someone who joined into the last song with praise and thanksgiving.  Those two pennies were given in gratitude.  At least that’s what I would like to believe.

I showed those two pennies to the gentleman who “witnesses” me placing the offering into the locked bank pouch.  

“Look at this,” I said.  “I love this.”  

“That’s probably all they had in their pocket,” he said.

The next day I shared this story with one of my friends.  She had a completely different perspective on the whole story.

“Don’t you think that was an amazing act of generosity?” I asked her.

“Or,” she said, “it was a statement.”

“A statement?”

“Yes, maybe that’s what they thought of the church service.”

Not two pennies but two cents.  That never even occurred to me.  Two cents sounds quite different that two pennies.  It has a very negative connotation.  “I wouldn’t give you two cents for your opinion,” comes to mind.  Someone thought the service was worth two cents?  I just can’t believe that, refuse to believe that.  I guess it’s all about perspective.

If you look at my financial situation, I have been very blessed and two pennies out of my pocket is very little and would probably be seen as a negative statement, sort of like leaving a penny at a table for a waitress who has done a horrible job (which I’ve never done, by the way).  But to someone who has nothing, who may not know where they are sleeping tonight or if they are going to get a meal? Those two pennies may be the difference between making bus fare and not -- and they chose to give it to the church.

If I could look back and pick one thing that has helped me through this very difficult time in my life, and taking my faith in Jesus out of the equation, it is my unwavering belief that humanity, down at the visceral level, is good.  It’s to keep a positive attitude and believe in the best from people.  I am choosing not to think of it as two cents but as two pennies.  I don’t want to have the two-cents mindset.  I want to have the two pennies mindset.  I want to think that humanity is hopeful, not cynical.  

We have a lot to learn from someone who places two pennies into an offering plate.  The bible is full of two-penny stories.  I don’t know for sure who put those two pennies in, but it makes me take a look at myself and ask if I am putting in my “two pennies” worth, not just in the offering plate, but into my faith in humanity.  I am thankful that it was my turn to collect the offering that day.  It was something that I needed to see.  It is these little lessons that make me a better person and give me hope for better tomorrows.   Thanks be to God!

One Year Ago ...

As a new year starts I usually have this habit of looking back and seeing how my life is different than it was in last year.  Is it better?  Is it worse?  What was I doing one year ago, or two years ago? Where was I mentally, emotionally, physically?  What have I accomplished in the last year?  What were the challenges and obstacles placed in my path and how did I overcome them?  

This past year has been particularly difficult.  My life has taken a huge left turn and, if you would have asked me a year ago, I could have never imagined that life could be this good.  

As I write this I think about all the people out there who feel like they are mired in unhappiness, whether it be a bad marriage or a bad job or anything in between, and believe that they will never be happy again. There is hope out there.  If I could just look you in the eyes and say, “Hang in there!” I would. You’ve all heard the saying, “Everything will be all right in the end, if it’s not all right, then it’s not the end.” Take heart, my friends. There is light at the end of the tunnel.

So I sit down, remembering where I was a year ago, and write down my observations about how much life can change in a year.  Here’s what I came up with:

One year ago I was discovering that more promises were broken and the lies had never stopped.

Today, I still have no answers; but his lies cannot hurt me any more.

One year ago someone who I thought was my friend took my husband’s side.

Today, I can be thankful that my ex-husband has someone to help him through a difficult time in his life.

One year ago I was looking for a way to die to get away from a life that had become this drudgery of disappointment after disappointment, and showed me no way out.

Today, I feel I have so much to live for.  Life is full of miracles.

One year ago I was mourning the loss of my 12-year old dog.  I felt completely lost without him, this canine companion with whom I had shared so much time.

Today, I have a new dog who, while not a replacement, is a wonderful successor.

One year ago I was looking at the prospect of uprooting my entire life and dreading what was to come.

Today, I am settled in my new home and routine, growing new roots, and looking forward to the future.

One year ago I was afraid of where I would live if I were to leave.

Today, I have benefitted from the generosity of family who have opened their home to me and protected me from harm and kept me safe.

One year ago the prospect of moving was looming ahead.

Today, after two moves, I have found a house that I can call a home.  

One year ago I was searching for a way out of a marriage.

Today, I am free of that marriage.

One year ago, I placed my trust in Jesus and surrendered my fate to Him.

Today, I am reaping the rewards of that trust.

Dreaming of Spring

I was looking through the pictures of gardens and flowers on my cell phone the other day and I really, really, really can’t wait for Spring. This winter is kicking my a$$, if you know what I mean. Arctic vortexes, wind chills that make you feel like you’re in outer space (there’s probably no wind in space except for solar wind, but you know what I mean), and it’s been snowing using the “water torture treatment” method, one-half inch at a time, either every day or every other day. And when it's not snowing the temperatures are plummeting below zero.  

The roads are a permanent mess, always wet, never dry. My car hasn’t been washed in a month and it looks like it. My feet are constantly frozen, from November through April, and no matter what I do it seems I just can't keep them warm.  I’m just miserable.

I live in Wisconsin. Say it with me:  “Wis-kaaaahn-sin”. We have six month winters. They start in late October and go through April.  The latest date it has ever snowed was May 10th. May!!!  Last year we had a cold, wet spring, followed by a cool summer and an early winter. I remember almost crying as the days ticked by and fall got closer. I really felt like I had been cheated out of the only season during which my feet aren’t cold.

I miss green. Around here in the spring and summer it’s a beautiful shade of green. The trees, the grass, the fields, everything is just eye-popping green. Right now the landscape looks like it was painted by an Ansel Adams wanna-be: black, white and grey with a hint of blue in the sky on some days.

It’s dark too. It’s dark when I get up and dark when I get home from work. I do not like getting up when it is still dark outside. As the days get longer it’s a bit better at night, but it’s still pretty dark in the morning. My only saving grace is that my desk is right next to a window so I do get to see the sun when it makes it’s rare appearances.

I walk my dog every day. Rain, snow, wind, in the dark, unless it's below zero she has to make sure she gets her walks. It would be very nice to say, "Honey, can you pleeeeeeeaaaase take the dog out for a walk today so my feet don't get cold?" But, alas, it's all up to me. So I bundle myself up every night after work and head out the door with my dog for our walks.

In the summer the Robins start singing about 4:30 in the morning and don’t stop until after 10:00 at night. The birds don’t sing as much in the winter, too. I miss the sound of the birds. The other day the temperatures were just about at the freezing mark and the birds were singing!! When you haven't heard that in a while it's a beautiful sound. Even my canary doesn’t like to sing in the winter. I know how he feels.

I still have my Christmas decorations up outside too. They are buried in about a foot of snow with just their little tops peeking out and their bottoms frozen to the ground. We usually get a January thaw when we get to take them down, but it’s not in the forecast this year.

But soon, probably before you know it, the snow will change to rain and I’ll eventually get to take my Christmas decorations down. Toward the end of February I will get to start some of my garden plants from seed and can watch them grow every day. Then the temps will start to creep over zero and up into the thirties!! Once it gets into the forties we will all have a full blown case of Spring fever. Can’t wait.

Until then, I still have my pictures from last year. I’m off to thaw out my feet.

Sono Sola

One of my favorite movies, “Eat, Pray, Love” has a line in it when Liz Gilbert is trying to learn Italian.  She says, “Sono Sola” or “I am alone”.  I remember that line specifically when I saw that movie the first time because I remember thinking that this could be me and I could relate to how she felt.  It was at a time in my life when I was trying to make the decision to leave my husband.

I have been married twice.  Once when I was 22, divorced at 31, single for 17 years, and then married again for four years.  For the first part of the 17 years I was single after my first marriage I dated with the purpose of finding another husband.  I didn’t like being alone.  I was afraid of getting old and being alone especially when my first husband remarried and got on with his life. But after a while I realized that I was doing okay and really didn’t need a man in my life, especially if he didn’t bring something to the relationship that I couldn’t provide for myself.

Being alone has it’s good points but it can also be a hassle.  This world seems biased toward couples.  The advertising drives me crazy with all the couple stuff, recipes are usually made for at least four people, the entire Entertainment book is filled with buy one, get one offers which I can’t use.  When I go to a party or an event, I’m usually the only one there who isn’t with someone else. It gets very tiring being the “third wheel”. 

Try putting up a long curtain rod when you have no help -- thank goodness for ladders.  Every time I want to buy a new piece of furniture I either have to pay to have it delivered or recruit some help (although I did manage to get a double mattress upstairs by myself -- thank you personal trainers). In addition, the monthly bills are a lot easier to pay when they are split in half.

However, I decided to look at being single in a glass-is-half-full attitude.  There are quite a few obvious benefits to being alone.  For instance, I don’t have this conversation anymore:

    “What do you want to have for supper tonight?”

    “I don’t know, what do you want?”

    “How about pork chops?”

    “No, I’m not in the mood for pork chops.”

    “Well, then how about fish?”

    “No, I don’t feel like eating fish.”

    “Well, then what do you feel like eating?”

    “I don’t know, just not pork chops or fish.”

That conversation?  Gone! 

I also get to have the entire bed to myself.  There’s an old country song, “Sleeping single in a double bed.”  Well I’m sleeping single in a KING bed!!  It’s awesome!  One night I fell asleep watching TV and woke up sideways in the bed.  Can’t do that with another person in there.  The rooms is kept at the right temperature, the electric blanket is on MY temperature setting, and I can have as many pillows as I want on the bed without anyone complaining about it.

Other obvious perks:

• No toothpaste splatters in, on and around the sink, and the seat is ALWAYS down;
• Clothes are put in the laundry basket when taken off or hung up or put away to be worn again;
• I can leave as many pairs of shoes out as I want, and anywhere I want;
• No explaining why I need another new pair of shoes;
• I get all the closets to myself;
• No trail of tools from the latest home project completed two weekends ago scattered across the house; until I pick them up which promptly receives a reply of, “I was just going to put those away”;
• The only unwashed dishes in the sink are mine and are the ones that don’t go into the dishwasher (the rest are put into the dishwasher right away);
• I don’t have to explain that the little light on the dishwasher above the “Clean” label means that the dishes in the dishwasher are, in fact, clean;
• Flowered sheets, pillows, comforters, towels, etc.
• I don’t have to watch any more movies that involve massive shooting sprees, or blowing things up, or dumb comedies; and I can watch “Pride and Prejudice” as many times as I want to, back-to-back, including director’s commentary.
• I could go on forever …

So now I have a new rhythm to life, a new chapter.  However this one is entirely on my own.  My son is 23 and is living in another city where he goes to college.  After I moved into this house I just bought I was surprised to realize that I had never actually lived alone.  I went from living in my parent’s house to living with my first husband.  Then when I got divorced my son and I lived together until I got remarried which is when my son moved away to college.  Being alone in a house is completely different.  Okay, well, technically I’m not really alone, alone.  I do have my cat and my canary.  And I also just adopted a sweet little rescue dog.  At least I have someone in the house so when my girlfriend pops over and hears me talking I can say I was talking to the dog, not myself (which I do, and which is okay when you live alone).  

Sono Sola:  I am alone and I am good with it.