My Mom's Salad Dressing Recipe

In honor of what would have been my Mom's 86th birthday, this past weekend I made her onion sour cream dressing. When we were growing up my mom used to throw this salad dressing together and it wasn't until I was grown up that I had asked her about it.  Turns out it was really simple. 

Throughout the years I have made a few tweaks to the recipe. I like to call it my supper club salad dressing recipe because it goes best with good old-fashioned iceberg lettuce and nothing else.

Here's the recipe (for one):

1 tablespoon sour cream
1/2 to 1 teaspoon grated onion (to taste)
1 teaspoon milk (or more to consistency)
1/4 teaspoon rice vinegar (just a couple of drops, really)
Good size pinch of dried herbs. I like using Fines Herbs or Bouquet Garni. You can mix up your own, too.
Pinch of salt
Couple grinds of pepper
Mix until smooth.

Now you can either use a wedge of iceberg lettuce like they did in the supper clubs or, even better, chop it all up.  I like to mix my dressing in the bottom of my salad bowl, throw in the lettuce, and then toss to coat.

This is a great, simple, refreshing salad dressing and it brings back lots of memories for me every time I make it. 

All it needs as an accompaniment is a brandy old-fashioned, sweet, with fruit.

Hope you enjoy it.

Happy birthday, Mom!!

An Abundance of Gratitude

The weather here in Wisconsin is glorious this week. People wonder why we live in this godforsaken part of the country and our answers usually range from "we love the change of seasons" to "the summers here are wonderful."

It's funny how a change in the temperature by only a few degrees in the right direction can give you a proper attitude adjustment. I have gone from wanting to climb back into bed every day and throwing the covers over my head to waking up before the alarm, throwing the covers aside and jumping out of bed every morning. 

The grass is green, the trees are blooming and leafing out, the flowers are full of all the colors of the rainbow, and the birds are singing from sun up to sun down. Even the people I meet--at the store, at church, at work, in the park--are in a better mood. 

Spring seems to rejuvenate us. It brings my neighbors out of their houses so we can once again get reacquainted. Last weekend I had a neighbor-day talking with my neighbors while they worked on their yards and sat on their patios relaxing in the warm sunshine. My dogs had a great time visiting with everyone and received lots of pats and kisses. 

Everywhere I look I find myself so moved by the beauty of God's earth that I am overflowing with gratitude. It seems to well up inside me until it can no longer be contained, and I realize in that moment that without the winter we couldn't have our beautiful springs and summers.

Thank you, Lord, for the green grass beneath our bare feet, for lilacs and flowering crabapple trees, for trees bursting with young leaves, for flowers in the ground and in hanging baskets, for herbs and the promise of a garden bounty, for the smell of fresh cut grass, for warm sunshine on our faces, for thunderstorms and raindrops, for the chorus of bird songs outside our windows, and for feet that are warm for the first time in almost eight months. Amen!!

Making Lemonade

Many months ago I wrote my first blog post as a guest writer on a friend's blog. As I haven't had a lot of time to write lately, I thought I would bring this one "out of the archives". This is one of those lessons that never gets old or outdated. 

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There’s an old proverb that says, “When life hands you lemons, make lemonade.”  Life has been handing me lots of lemons lately:  a trust betrayed, the breakup of a marriage, the upheaval of my life. And while I have been trying to make lemonade out of all these lemons, it’s coming out pretty sour.

It took me a long time to decide to leave my husband.  In the many months that preceded this decision I spent a lot of time worrying. It seemed like my mind was constantly spinning. I couldn’t sleep very well because I would wake up in the middle of the night and instantly my mind would start to churn. I would be driving to and from work and all the while my mind would be churning, churning. Do I go, do I stay? Even after I made the decision to leave, the worrying got worse.

 

As a Christian, we are taught not to worry, not only about tomorrow, but as a rule in general. We are to place our trust in God, casting our cares to Him. While this sounds easy enough in theory, in truth I wish someone would tell that to my churning mind.  

So I prayed. I prayed that God would take these cares from me and help me to make the right decisions. I prayed that God would stop this churning mind of mine and give me some peace. In the midst of all this turmoil God revealed a very simple solution.

I have this little book I read every night before I go to bed written by Sarah Young called, “Jesus Calling.” Throughout this book there is a theme that suggests that any time you want to feel the presence of Jesus, speak His name. I even wrote that on a post-it note and put it in the front inside cover of the book. And then I found this scripture: “For everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved.” (Romans 10:13 NLT) Could it really be that simple?  

One day on my way to work, as I found myself once again obsessing over things I couldn’t control, I spoke His name: “Emmanuel”. As an answer to a prayer, my mind went quiet.

In the Hebrew language Emmanuel literally means “God is with us”. I have found that by speaking His name in times of trouble it has become a way for me to stop my obsessive thoughts and put my focus where it should be, on God. This one word, spoken in a moment when God is not in the forefront of my thoughts, puts God first and gives me the sweet calming that I so desperately need. It is the sugar to sweeten my sour lemonade, an answer to a prayer, a miracle.

Throughout this difficult time I have traveled a path that I would have thought impossible only a few short months ago, and God has been there with me every step of the way. In the end I have learned that through the tough times the only thing I need to do is: breathe in and breathe out, put one foot in front of the other, and let God take care of the rest. God has answered many prayers for me and I have so much to be thankful for. These days I not only speak “Emmanuel” as a cry for help, but also as a word of thanksgiving. Thank you, Lord, for taking care of me.  

Lemonade anyone?

Everyday Failures

Do you ever feel like all you ever do is fail at stuff? 

I was feeling like this one morning while I was syncing up my pedometer-like device. You see I have this goal set for the amount of steps I'm supposed to take in a day and with a desk job I really have to try hard to get them all in. I missed my goal the day before by 46 steps. 46! If I had known that before I went to bed I would have walked around the house for a couple of minutes. Needless to say I now synch my device before I go to bed.

The competitive side of me is too stubborn to just ignore it. I could just tell myself that it was only 46 steps, but try to tell that to the tracking software. 

I can't tell you how many times I have changed clothes to go for a walk and have forgotten to put my band back on only to find out I missed my daily steps goal by the amount of the walk I just completed without the band.  It drives me crazy!

Failure. Again. 

I keep hearing Yoda's voice going through my head, "Do or do not. There is no try."

It's not just the walking steps goal where I fail, but little things throughout the day, too. It's the daily struggle to eat right. It's the promise to myself to be a better pray-er or more thankful or more patient. It's trying to get all the housework done, only to be sidelined by an unexpected task or diversion.

The other night as I was saying my prayers I fell asleep in the middle of the Lord's Prayer. I woke up the next morning and immediately thought, "I can't even do this right!" Talk about failure! Do you think God would understand? I'm guessing He would.

I was walking the dogs one evening and going through an inventory in my mind of all the things I had failed to do or finish or manage that day. It was disheartening.

So I'm trying to figure out if I'm just being unreasonable or too hard on myself or looking at this from a glass-is-half-empty attitude. Another voice, this one from Dr. Phil, is saying to me, "So how's this working for you?"

Obviously, instead of focusing on what I didn't achieve I need to see what I did.

I was a productive member of society. I put in an honest days work. I didn't get arrested that day. I didn't hurt someone. Hopefully I even made someone smile or made someone's day a bit better. 

Life is hard. Add in all the expectations we place on ourselves and it gets even harder. I think that I just need to give myself a break and do the best that I can on a daily basis. Some days I may fall short of my goals, but some days I will surpass them. Thankfully, at least I have goals.

Henry David Thoreau said, "What you get by achieving your goals is not as important as what you become by achieving your goals." 

Bo Bennett said, "The discipline you learn and character you build from setting and achieving a goal can be more valuable than the achievement of the goal itself."

So with a twist of irony, in my failure to achieve my goals I am actually accomplishing something. I am building character and learning discipline.

Only 3,624 steps left to go today ... piece of cake!

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The Grape Tomato Conundrum

A couple of summers ago, I had a record-breaking year with my tomato plants which yielded, in addition to some quality heirloom tomatoes, zillions of little grape tomatoes. I had bowlfuls of the little red orbs scattered everywhere in my kitchen. What do I do with all these tomatoes?

I spoiled myself with bruschetta made with grape tomatoes, and grape tomato pasta, and grape tomato salads. They were so sweet and so tasty that the words "grape tomatoes" became synonymous with summer.

Last year, since I couldn't have a garden, I started buying grape tomatoes from the grocery store. Seriously? How good could these really be? I mean, they weren't watered and talked to and encouraged to grow by their home gardener who painstakingly watches every inch of their growth with awe and wonder. But I was desperate so I bought them anyway.

Garden overflowing with tomato plants

I needed some tomatoes for a bruschetta that I was going to make as an appetizer for a dinner party, and at the time the grape tomatoes were the best looking tomatoes in the store. Surprisingly, they were delicious! The smell while I was cutting them, their juiciness, and their sweetness all reminded me of last summer's grape tomato feasts.

Since that time those little packages of grape tomatoes have become a staple at my house. They have an incredible shelf life (don't put them in the fridge!), they're good for you, and they're inexpensive.

My favorite pre-workout meal? Grape tomato bruschetta.  Here's the recipe for one serving:

Toast up a piece of whole-grain, rustic bread (or several smaller pieces). The drier the bread the better so I toast this up well ahead of time.
Slice up 10 grape tomatoes (not 9, not 11 ... 10!), first in halves, then half the halves, then half the quarters, and put them in a bowl.*
Add about a tablespoon of extra virgin olive oil, or enough to make it saucy.
Then add a couple of pinches of salt and a couple grinds of pepper.
To that, add in 1/4 teaspoon of finely chopped garlic (more if you like it more garlicky)
Is "garlicky" a word? No red squiggles so I guess so.
If you have it, which I usually don't, add in a few fresh basil leaves, prepared a la chiffonade (which means you roll up the leaves and then slice them thinly). If you don't have fresh basil, I use dried basil (a few pinches) and fresh parsley. Dried herbs work too.
Add in some grated parmesan cheese, about one tablespoon or a good sized pinch, eyeball it.
Lastly, add about 1/2 teaspoon of balsamic vinegar (more if you like it more vinegary).
Vinegary is a word too!  Who knew?
Stir it all together an let it sit while you take the dogs for a walk.  Oh wait ... you don't have dogs? Well then let it sit for about 30-45 minutes.
Place toast on plate, place tomato mixture on toast, consume while making yummy sounds.

My other grape tomato go-to? Grape tomato pasta. Click on the link to get there as this is not my recipe. Okay ... the real reason for the link is I don't feel like re-typing it. 

You will find it is surprisingly good for something so simple to make. Instead of cherry tomatoes I use, of course, grape tomatoes.  Also, instead of draining the pasta I add it directly to the pan from the water, and then add a bit of the pasta water to the pan as well. This will create a lovely sauce once the starchy pasta water mixes with the olive oil. To add another dimension add some red wine to the sauce (let it simmer a few minutes) before you add in the pasta.

Okay enough typing -- time for eating!

* This reminds me of a joke: Do you know why elephants wear tennies?  Because elevensies are too big and ninesies are too small! Love that one!  :)

Healing the Broke-Open Heart

Some weeks ago, one of our Pastors at church told us a story during her sermon about a man speaking to his Rebbe.  It went something like this:

"Rebbe, why does the Torah tell us to 'place these words upon your hearts'? Why does it not tell us to place these holy words in our hearts?" The rebbe answers, "It is because as we are, our hearts are closed, and we cannot place the holy words in our hearts. So we place them on top of our hearts.  And there they stay until, one day, the heart breaks [open] and the words fall in."--Parker Palmer, "The Politics of the Brokenhearted"

Have you ever heard the expression a "hardened heart"? Sometimes I think that's what happens to us as we go through a divorce. We get hardened hearts. We want to protect our hearts so we put up barriers to keep from getting hurt again. In essence we strengthen ourselves by thickening the outer shell of our hearts and making them impenetrable. In essence we are saying, "You are not going to hurt me again."

But it doesn't have to be a divorce that will put you in this hardened-heart state. It can be anything that hurts your heart and makes you not want to go through that hurt again. Losing a spouse, a job, a friend, or a beloved pet will do it. Having your only child go off to college just about did me in. Suffering through illness, setbacks, or accidents can do it too. It can happen when we go through any life changes--we grieve the life we lost and try to protect ourselves from any more suffering.

The problem is, that sometimes, by hardening our hearts--raising our "shields" so to speak-- we keep God out too.

For a long while after I got divorced the only thing my heart could feel was anger. This was the hardening of my heart. In the course of one year I had lost a marriage, two beloved pets and my home. I was angry at my husband, angry I had to go through a divorce again, angry I had to move, angry my life was in upheaval. I would say to myself, "Just get through the day, don't think about what's you've lost or question what lies ahead." I felt abandoned and unloved. It seemed for the longest time as if I was stuck in survival mode.

My pastor said in her sermon, "Survival mode can divorce us from hope; and hope is the nearness of God." That was the last thing I wanted. I wanted to be closer to God, not shut Him out. I wanted to envelop myself in His loving arms and have Him tell me everything was going to be okay. I wanted to feel hope again.

I would search through the Bible for divine comprehension as to why my heart had to suffer. I would look up verse after verse on hope and healing and suffering. Eventually I found a common theme running through all these passages: give it all to God and he will comfort you and carry your burdens. 

So I laid down my swords, lowered my shields, and let God near. All the scripture that I read, all the prayers I prayed, all the hope that I longed for fell into in my heart that had broke-open. I heard His promises that he would never hurt me and that my happiness was through Him and did not depend on someone else's broken promises or a weaver of lies. And you know what? He was right.

There is happiness to be found in living a life that is not based on any relationship other than your relationship with God. If you have that relationship--or THE relationship--others will surely follow. And if it took my heart breaking open to make me realize that, then I am willing to suffer the pain of a broke-open heart.

So what ever trial you are going through, what ever heartbreak you have suffered, what ever life changes you are in the midst of, know that there is promise in your broke-open heart. Don't divorce yourself from hope--bask in the light that is the nearness of God.